The State of Abe, Inc.

Departing for Arcadia, will be in communication blackout for the rest of the year...

I have been stranded on the desert island of Irvine since break began a week ago. Friends that happen to be here have made it awesome, but I gotta ship out cuz it's my time, it's just my time.

Friends Jeff and Yonnie are coming to the rescue... a night of movies and then bring me back home. Why drive that far? Because I couldn't come up to hang out them, they decided spontaneously to come down and pick me up. Thanks you guys, how sweet is that? How sweet?!

Plans for Break? hang out with inner group friends from back in the days of high school, get those law school apps done, and go up to SF to see relatives.

Keep it sexi all.

APHTSAI: silly old abe
Big BeeBee: trix are for kids!!!

Talked to Cynthie about Europe 40/40 tonight, and we are hyped!!!

Land of Harry Potter, the dwelling of Lord of the Rings, James Bond's pad, hell yeah!!! To visit all the places that we have read about and heard about for so long back since the days of history class.

The most exciting part of the trip for me is the London self-backpacking... we have tentatively decided to conquer the city in 7 days on our own accord. We decide how we want to travel. There is uncertainty, what great adventure food. Since the city seems to be relatively safe, London will be our base of operations, our playground for a week. How cool is that? How cool?!!!!!

I need to learn how to make money. There are plenty of ways to do so, approaching infinity. I just need to learn one or two... And I find myself far off the mark thusfar. Must conquer financial world!

To test the faith within a friendship it is simple.

Imagine that you have kids. If you are willing to leave ur kids unsupervised with ur friend, that is a good friend. How many real friends do YOU have?

**by the way, if you are reading this, chances are you are one of the people that I would trust my kids with.

How are you keeping things sexi in your life???

Reliving the moment...

This day last year, it was Day2 of our East Coast Odyssey. We were in New York.

Application process sucks ass:

Big BeeBee: aww i'm screwed
Big BeeBee: can't mail out before january then

SARMOTI666: why?

Big BeeBee: i need to finish essay
Big BeeBee: then have it editted
Big BeeBee: i'm filling forms out now
Big BeeBee: then i need to certify checks
Big BeeBee: then i need to send by certified mail

SARMOTI666: yeah its a pain in the ass

Big BeeBee: aww fuck i need a resume too
Big BeeBee: oh this is bad
Big BeeBee: really really bad
Big BeeBee: and university of texas wants a two page personal statment
Big BeeBee: freaking a
Big BeeBee: booooooooo
Big BeeBee: not cool
Big BeeBee: not cool at all

SARMOTI666: two pages?
SARMOTI666: so you have to truncate it?
SARMOTI666: i got your 2 pages:
SARMOTI666: PAGE 1: FUCK
SARMOTI666: PAGE 2: YOU

Big BeeBee: HAHA

**I love how connie thinks....

Screening for Lady Wang... finding the girlfriend who will become the queen of my realm.

peppyshoe: what are the six levels?

**The Six Levels... The advice of some is more salient than others, and there are six groups of people who have the power to screen Lady Wang potentials. I call them the Six Levels. They must all approve her before marriage. If Lady Wang is reading this now, don't worry, the Six Levels will be easy.

Big BeeBee: well,
Big BeeBee: bon forms a level
Big BeeBee: parents form a level
Big BeeBee: inner group forms a level
Big BeeBee: ellen forms a level
Big BeeBee: college group forms a level
Big BeeBee: and certain relatives form a level

peppyshoe: that's a lot of approval that u hafta go thru
peppyshoe: u need approval from all six?

Big BeeBee: that would be good, but it is not necessary that all the members within a Level agree.
Big BeeBee: some members have more salience than others within Levels
Big BeeBee: like u and justin would be high within the Inner Group Level

Big BeeBee: if it is only one person in a level,
Big BeeBee: then that means he/she must agree
Big BeeBee: the smaller the group, the more important consensus is.

peppyshoe: wow, i have a lot of responsibility then...i shall carry my position with honor.

Ellen, Advisor to Ambassador Council and Level Six Lady Wang Check writes,

**********
Abe ---
You are one-of-a-kind -- a very special kind. Your humanity, generosity, sense of humor and intellect define you. Please don't worry about the future too much. Follow your heart and you will have great happiness ( this sounds like a fortune cookie!).
You certainly enriched my life , the lives of the Ambassadors & GC students this quarter--- Thank You So Much.
Have a great break!
Love,
Ellen
**********

how cool is ellen?! How cool?!!!!!!

Lady Wang vs. Friend

Friend Frances asks, what if Lady Wang (the gurl I am destined to marry) turns out to be a gurl one of my friends thinks is the one for him? In other words, who would I choose… Lady Wang or my friend?

Good question. My philosophy is that there is no one soulmate, rather there is a group of females compatible with me, and that any one female from this group of “soulmates” is hook up potential. This makes Frances question very credible, because my friend could indeed be attracted to a Lady Wang… cuz a few of them have the same great taste in females as myself.

Okay, so being that there are plenty Lady Wangs out there to meet, I would probably defer to my friend if he called it first. If he were already courting her, I’d back off. A friend is a citizen of Wang Empires, therefore, it is my duty to protect him, not take from him. A friend that is willing to sacrifice friends is not a good friend.

If I was first, I’d talk to the friend, I’d talk to Lady Wang, hoping that something would pan out. Whoever makes Lady Wang the happiest should have first dibbs. Love is about willingness to sacrifice, and if I truly have found my princess queen and she wants to be elsewhere, then it would be selfish and wrong to take her for myself.

Europe 40/40 Update... I need a show of hands:

Taking time off to read up on the reviews from people who have gone on the tours...they are saying that the 46 day tour is better than the 37 day that we chose.

But if we follow advice,
We are left with some interesting options,

A shorter self tripping in London. I know people would love to self-trip and by extending this portion of our trip, we may be able to explore areas outside of London, like Stonehenge/ cambridge/ oxford...

Or a longer adventure which will cost an extra 1000. I know money is an issue, and people have summer school.

California Dreamin:.. justin has a dream and we try to interpret it.

BioChemDork: i had the weirdest dream
BioChemDork: you were in it
BioChemDork: you, me, richard and cynthie went to europe

Big BeeBee: excellent
Big BeeBee: in that case,
Big BeeBee: ur just dreaming about the future [insider info--reference to europe 40/40, trying to get justin to come with us]
Big BeeBee: u so gotta blog that [insider info--justin hasn't had the energy to blog for a while]

BioChemDork: uh
BioChemDork: we got stuck in a haunted chateau/inn in switzerland
BioChemDork: webecame part of its *ahem* tenants

Big BeeBee: good ghosts?

BioChemDork: does it matter?
BioChemDork: we got killed
BioChemDork: [sigh]

Big BeeBee: ok...
BioChemDork: such a scary dream
Big BeeBee: cuz we got killed?

BioChemDork: incidentally, you started arguing with one of the ghosts, trying to convince her to be good
BioChemDork: and she did
BioChemDork: but the ghost leader came and killed you and her

Big BeeBee: haha
Big BeeBee: the ghost leader killed a ghost?
Big BeeBee: finally i'm in one of ur dreams
Big BeeBee: damn
Big BeeBee: its about time

BioChemDork: dude, you got killed
BioChemDork: and you're happy?

Big BeeBee: i was mentioned in the dream
Big BeeBee: and in a good connotation too

BioChemDork: but you got killed!

Big BeeBee: didn't u see my blog about that?

*************
How do you want to be remembered? We often take things for granted and in a century like this one, how can we not?

I want to be remembered as a servant protector of all things good and beautiful. As the King's Guard in ancient Greece used to say, "All men have fears, but the brave put down their fears and go forward, sometimes to death, but always towards victory."
******************************

Big BeeBee: in short,
Big BeeBee: we all die
Big BeeBee: it is how we die
Big BeeBee: and look at the way i died
Big BeeBee: converting evil to good
Big BeeBee: and with my friends

BioChemDork: but you became a ghost

Big BeeBee: it takes courage to step up to evil for the good of ur friends
Big BeeBee: justin, i do believe you have made my day

I define success by other people. I measure what I do according to what would give the members of Wang Empires the greatest pride. So success is a combination of happiness, morals, values, and financial power.

Advisor Ellen is the coolest person in the world. She sent us an email saying:

Mother Teresa said :
People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them
anyway.

If you are kind, People may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind
anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true
enemies; Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank
anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world
the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God(your Conscious); It was never between you and them anyway. "

OH MY GOD (do not read until u have hella time cuz i'm going into details with this one)

I just came back from the best party ever!!!!!!!!! Ambassadors Council Dinner/Party. Our advisor, Ellen, hosted about 40 people at her place... the food was great, the company was great, the joy and warmth of all was touching. This will be a college moment to tell to the grandkids.



White Elephant Gifts:

**The idea.... of "white elephant" is that a bunch of people bring unisex gifts, numbers are picked, and whoever has the lowest number picks first. The catch is that the people with the highest numbers choose last, but have the opportunity to "steal" gifts, meaning that they can take a gift from someone who went earlier.

**My gift-- cuz i was worried that someone might forget to bring a gift, I built two boxes of stuff. The two boxes were similar, but the idea was to find things from home that were ordinary and give them a new spin. I purposely sealed and decorated the boxes so that they would be difficult to take apart... anticipation factor. Each box took three hours or so... The contents with labels:

--opening message... Congrads, you have opened me. I am fran, the servant elf of a great emperor from your neighboring lands. we hereby offer gifts from our treasury.
--a can of coke... cuz alcohol would be inappropriate
--passion potion (aftershave bottle)... sprinkle three dropps on someone and i guarentee they will turn around to talk to u
--a bottle of bubbles... smile maker.
--toothpaste and dental gum packages... because your smile is your best asset.
--a firework... got a light? please use responsibly.
--a bottle of water (arrowhead brand)... filtered dino pee
--a dollar with the words... the first dollar for your travel fund. Do not spend on anything else but travel or u will have hairy ankles forever
--earplugs...silence when you need it.
--a bag of candy with the words: whats a gift that can't keep on giving? share this with all worthy Ambassador Council friends.

I was so freaking relieved when my gifts were successes... 40 people laughed together at all the labels on my gifts when they were read aloud. They all looked in anticipation as Friend Pam tried to open the gift. Somehow she knew it was from me and she said outloud that's why she picked it. That right there was wow. As each gift was explained, outside I was poker face, but inside I was all: YAEEEEE!!! Hecks yeah!!! It was so worth the time I put into them. People actually came up to me to congratulate me later with personal compliments on individual gifts which totally blew me away.

**The gift I got-- I initially got a beanie babie camel, which was "stolen," so I decided to do some "stealing" of my own. I stole from a person who stole from someone else earlier in the game, ending up with the gift Friend Jenny brought, a calender of with travel tips... it is a desktop calender which you rip one off page each day. Yall know I'm the travel fanatic, so when I saw it wrapped I was all OH MY GOSH, that gift is so gonna be stolen by me. It was. Thanks Jenny, props to your choice in gifts.


Learning to Knit... I saw a middle aged lady quietly knitting on the sofa apart from the crowd, so I asked her about knitting cuz it looked interesting. Well, long story short, I got her fone number cuz she invited me to join her knitting group next quarter. She is a wise woman, so aside from the knitting skill which I can employ later in gift giving, I can bond with Mrs. Woo who I find brillant. She is one of the contributors to the Ambassador Council.


The food and environment...Ellen sure knows how to party with style. I was all mixing 7up with all these wines... the south australian wine was really good actually... there were appetizers, main courses, desserts, well stocked minibar, tea station...wow. Even stepping into the bathroom was like wow... it was hella better than the best bathrooms in Las Vegas...

Big BeeBee: i was totally afraid to pee
Big BeeBee: i was looking around all over the place at the decorations
Big BeeBee: which is unusual
Big BeeBee: ;-)

I saw good taste everywhere. I also chatted with a whole bunch of people from all age groups... at first I felt a bit out of place and not knowing what kind of party it was, but then I became abe, and that seemed sufficiently entertaining for everyone and myself.


Misc Thoughts...

**these people are getting special treatment in a sense... they are seeing the true abe in all my glory, fears and faults faster than most people I meet. Perhaps it is cuz I sense I am interacting with great, high quality people. Perhaps it is my own sense of urgency to make lifelong friends before graduation. I am starting to learn that things are only good when you invest time, heart, and soul into the task. So those that sit on their asses saying they are bored, beware.

**Thank you Friend Alice who gave a ride there... I haven't known you for a long time (3 months), but somehow I sense that you will always be there for me. I grant you a seat on my Elven Council (see previous blog), cuz it is totally obvious that you care about people and take the time to think about people from their shoes. Such empathy I haven't seen for a while. This parallels the huge support and inspiration you are.

**I want to be like my advisor (and mentor) Ellen. I have heard people say so many great things about her, that I know my comments won't be able to compare. It is sufficient to say that she is the sixth level in my Six Levels, making her a screener for potential Lady Wangs (see previous entry). I have known her for about 3 months. The other Levels of this group I have known for years.

**I feel closer to some Ambassadors than others, but of the people I have met in these three months, these people are the ones I feel closest to, the ones that I can tell anything to, well on their way to joining Wang Empires (alphabetical order)...
Alice
Iris
Jenny
Jackie
Masato
Miki
Pam
Satoshi
Yesi

Thank you all for being you... there maybe more, but it is 3am, and my memory is blanking...

It feels good for people to understand me, and I feel by reading this blog, you are on your way to becoming my family...members of Wang Empires.

Wang Empires (WE)... includes my family and close friends...is only a title, and I am only its servant. The idea is that "we," all the people that I care about, will be taken care of. When my personality test said I was a Loyal Rebel, it was right. I take care of my own.

Abe's Elven Council... is the group of mentors and close friends who give me advice on various issues. These people are the ones I go to when I'm lost. Some of them read this blog. Those that read this blog, can understand me, and can thereby have the potential to become members.

The Six Levels... The advice of some is more salient than others, and there are six groups of people who have the power to screen Lady Wang potentials. I call them the Six Levels. They must all approve her before marriage. If Lady Wang is reading this now, don't worry, the Six Levels will be easy.

if you want to find out more about yourself, go to www.emode.com

Last personality test for the night... what type am I?

abe, you're a Type 9 - The Negotiator

Friends, family, and colleagues likely appreciate this unpretentious way about you and admire the good-natured approach you can take to relationships and life in general. They're also apt to know that when they come to you with a problem, you can be counted on to be reassuring and patient. As a Negotiator, you're likely to be seen as a good moderator and communicator who emphasizes finding equitable, amicable resolutions to problems.

On what my best quality is (personality tests continued)....

abe, your best quality shines through in how Reliable you are!

The fact that you're a reliable and dependable person whom others can usually count on really draws people to you! But that's not the only thing. Your answers on the test indicate you're a funny person who is likely known for your great sense of humor. You are a hopeful and optimistic person who tends to look on the bright side of life, too.

You're on the phone with a friend making arrangements to meet somewhere and they say one last thing before hanging up with you. Which of these best captures it?

**Don't be late
**Dress for the occasion this time
**Don't back out on me
**I promise you'll like it
**We can do it your way next time

On what motivates me... (personality tests continued)

abe, your Key Motivator, the thing that really drives you to success in life, is Stability.

Based on your answers about values, past behaviors, and internal priorities, we can tell you look for ways to be safe, and to understand cause and effect relationships in your life. It's important to you to avoid situations with ambiguous or uncertain outcomes, and you're willing to apply your skills to the right tasks to make sure you've got a backup plan or a safety net for the big decisions in life.

You take comfort in knowing you're prepared for your future and as such, take the necessary steps to make your life more predictable. Whether that means setting up a good savings account, educating yourself, or physically safeguarding your home with alarms or new storm windows, you do well when stability is in your sights. It's not that you can't handle adversity; it's just that you prefer to be prepared for it.

In fact, you probably tend to feel the most secure when you're in control. You've got your life mapped out ahead of you and it gives you pleasure when you see your dreams and hopes met according to plan.

Up late at night enjoying the convienient access to cable modem and taking personality tests...

on my values...

abe, your values help make you a Loyal Rebel

Your number one priority appears to be honoring the relationships you have with other people. Whether this comes in the form of "protecting your own" even when they've done wrong, or telling the truth to friends in good times and bad, you can be counted on to be there for the others in your life. However, those who don't know you may not get the benefit of such special treatment. In fact, when it comes to dealing with authority figures, you may consider yourself to be something of a rebel. As a result, types like you can sometimes question laws that keep you from something you feel is rightfully yours because you might feel you've earned it.

people with the same type are usually the most compatible. But besides being with another Loyal Rebel, the two types that you most closely match with are Resourceful Independent and Privacy Guardian.

Quarterly Report, the State of Abe Address:

For me the quarter cannot be counted as completed until...
**Finish Law school apps
**I complete my last book, Guide to the Wallstreet Journal.

Taking this quarter off, I have not been idle. Rather, it may have been my busiest and most valuable quarter of all. Main questions pondered:
What makes college something that people remember for the rest of their lives? How well has my and my parents investment in a college education paid off? How can I get better returns from my college career with my last year? I need to eliminate all possible future regret...

This quarter has been about eliminating chickenassedness... I think I took a good leap in the right direction, but there is more to do. So much more to do. I have always believed I was endowed with a mission in life. That I'm basically invincible and impervious to death until my mission is accomplished. What is this mission? I don't quite know, but it must be big, cuz so far I think I'm the luckiest boy alive. If today my life were to suddenly end, I would owe the world hella favors.

I found the key to making friends. It is getting out there, standing in front of people, saying, "hi, my name is abe," and finding common ground as quickly as possible. Don't be afraid to smile and laugh. And remember, for every person you meet and become friends with, you have made 5 friends, cuz people know other people. Lifelong friends seems to be one of the main points of college.

Getting a girlfriend... Damn, Lady Wang sure is slow in the coming. My last year; where I will be in the future fogged in uncertainty and hope, I do not think I will see the day when I will have a girlfriend in college. I'm going on to law school, in no mood to start a long distance relationship... the problem is that if I meet her, I will want to be near Lady Wang, and at this point, I can't stop my momentum... all I can tell myself is to keep priorities straight and keep becoming the man Lady Wang can fall in love with. Therefore, my official position is to establish friendships with all I meet. Will I regret this? I haven't figured that one out yet...

Did a lot of reading this quarter. Gleaned many lessons and ideas, but what I learned most had nothing to do with my readings... it was that college is all about self learning. My most memorable classes were the ones that I spent the most time on. You literally control how much you want to learn. There are external barriers stopping people, but don't worry about those... people tend to stop themselves wayyyy before they hit those barriers. The ball is in your court. Play.

Once again I must thank you for taking the time to read my humble thoughts. I love the feedback. The true test of success in blogging is when people choose to read your blog when they have seemingly more important things to do. May your time invested in reading about me be the best investment you ever make. God save the queen.

It seems that my Dec 9th comment about self-confidence was really enjoyed by a lot of people. Thanks to those that reposted on their blogs to spread the word. (In Building a Chickenless Ass: Confidence is simply trust in self. If you can't trust self, why would others want to trust you?)

I should note that this idea was derived from a conversation with Friend Ellen, whose questions about why I wanted to become a lawyer clarified both our complex confusions. Thanks Ellen, keep the questions coming!!!

The world is so much more quiet after finals. Sadness. I've always wanted time alone, but on my own terms.

What would you do with a free hour? why?


I would go to the beach and build a sand hill. It feels good to go digging around squishing beach sand in hand and breathing in the sea air.

But, depending on the person, I might choose to sit and chat.

The ugly duckling story.

Sometimes we see our faults as disadvantages, then the context changes and our faults become our strengths. So take note all you weird peoplez, we just need to find our fit and the world will wonder why we are so good at what we do.

Weird peoplez brains are wired differently, so it will naturally make them worse at things society expects people to do well in and better at things that the majority of society can't do.... as long as the weird person doesn't get discouraged or cynical and decides to screw society.

Anyone want to watch Star Trek Nemesis besides me?

The more I think about it, the next step in my adventure lies outside of California.

How can this coming winter break top last year's winter break in New York? *shakes head*

oo oo! Look what I found!!!

The INVENTORY of icebreaker questions... I am gonna start the next revolution in journaling baby!!! Printed out questions, will address one periodically!!! eeeeeeeeeee hehe

(recognized blogging limit for the day!)

What's your wild dream? The dream that when you don't dare say cuz people will laugh?

I'm going to law school to find my voice. When I grow up, I'm gonna use my voice to save the world. The world will thank me by offering me a free trip to mars with a stop off at the moon. I will gladly accept. Of course, I'm bringing back sackfuls of rocks for yall.

To the cynical people reading this: take a number, stand in line, oh and I hope you brought your sack lunch and sleeping bag.

Ok, fed up. For those that claim boredom, I got an idea on how to solve it.

Do something cool for someone else. No money? Here's some ideas...

*make a card
*write a poem
*paint a picture
*make a coupon book in which you offer to help them in various things
*make dinner/cookies/pancakes for someone
*call someone to say happy tuesday.

Still lost? IM me. If you are bored after age 9, something needs to change.

New Used Car due: Dec20th.

Type: Toyota Priva Minivan, dark red.

Purchasing method: CASH from Abe funds. That's right, I bought it myself!!! How i will pay for gas is another matter...

Name: Shadowfax (fastest horse in lord of the rongs) POSSUM (piece of shiat so under maintained)

Purpose:
--Internship... something business or law related, doesn't have to be paid.
--Join the normal world.
--Ridegiving... I haven't driven in 4 years, so for your own sakes, no rides for 3 months. Then I owe the world rides.

GodBless America. The land where I can make a whole bunch of money for all the cool people I know.

Just gotta speak the right language that's all. Deciphering...

What I Discovered Today:

*I'm finicky.
*I can teach/lead a bunch of rowdy Jr. High kids afterall. It's quite easy actually, anything I find interesting they do too.

*I can disarm people in bad moods.
*That my mentor Ellen is willing to act as my 6th level check for potential Lady Wang.

*My preferred method of getting people to be quiet is to talk louder.
*People have to remind me that i'm being too loud.

*My preferred method for dealing with kids is to be one of them rather than separate self as an authority figure.

What do you usually eat?!

my meals for the day, represents typical diet:

Brunch:
*Miso soup (with noodle, seaweed, tofu, green onion, and beef chunks)
*apple

Snacks:
*raisins
*dried apricots
*apple juice

Dinner:
*tacos and co (50% tuesdays!)
*soda

Dear Friend Alice asks: if you were to make your own Life quote, what would it be??

Damn it is hella dark, turn on the light yo!

Lost Names, a book about a Korean boy becoming a man during the Japanese occupation, has been conquered. Awesome book, my roommate Kevin was reading it for some class. I recommend to all.

Talked to Friends Sunny, Christine, and Dan yesterday till late night. *Sigh* (of content)... nothing like finals stress to loosen tongues...

Interesting questions:

*Do you ever imagine how other people would do in bed?

*What type of people do you think I go for? (We interpreted each other on this one)

*How trusting are you of others?

*What does an after-sex flush look like?

Raisins are pretty good until after the fourth box or so... but of all the health foods, they sure store well, are compact and are cost effective. I guess I'll keep them in my diet, along with the canned tuna.

Friend Rh found a good question:

If someone says the word "rock" what is it you think of first....

A)Alcatraz,
B)side-to-side motion,
C)diamond-quality,
D)stone,
E)genre of music

Art of War & Sun Pin's Art of Warfare has been conquered.

Happy Finals Week all:

It's the happ-happiest time of the quarterrrrrrrrrr,

When the couple hookup percentage goes up...

When late night bonding skyrockets...

When people crack open the books for the first time and I don't have to study alone...

perfect. Just perfect.

In Building a Chickenless Ass:

Confidence is simply trust in self. If you can't trust self, why would others want to trust you?

Thanks Christine and Sunny for:

A) taking the time to think of us over the holidays and during FINALS WEEK.

B) baking some really good cookies and then wrapping them in cutsy styrofane.


What a nice and sexi thing to do. We feel loved. My interpretation of this is that I think females should get a more equal distribution of workload away from the tradition of domestic duties, but when a females does a traditional act symbolically and out of kindness, DANG THAT IS SEXY!!!!!

Japanese Buffet, Bunch:

Oh my goodness, so freaking full. Went with roommates on last bit of fun before finals. I have my law school apps to complete, so I claim that is my surrgate finals week. We stayed for 2.5hrs. Oh wow that was good eatin'

Tried sea urchin egg for the first time. It didn't go down very well. But the other stuff was wow.

Cost 26 bucks (tax and tip included), but better than a vegas buffet by far.

Friend Alice Queries: when were you the most proud of yourself in your lifetime?????


When I learned to tie my shoes. I had the hardest time in the world. Sigh. If it wasn't for my parents insisting that adults must wear "grown up shoes," then I would still be happily wearing velcro. Damn that was hard. Talk about challenges.

How about asking a gal out to prom? damn that was some hard stuff yo!

Then there was joining speech and debate, where I had to talk in public. Broke varsity, and the first thing I thought to do was... VERIFY!!!

Or leading Tutor/Volunteer Club in high school... talking in public is hard, but talking in public with friends in the audience is so much freakin harder cuz you get to see them again and again after the fact. Or when I lead a group of volunteer center to my first outreach activity... imagine, me who doesn't drive and have nooo experience, suddenly in charge of 20 rowdy high school students...first thought: FUCK! After the fact: Oh thank God.

How about entering the dorms, being the dinky, unimportant freshman I was? My goals were narrow then... good grades and plenty of friends... god i hate eating alone... and friends can offer protection for the paranoid freshman. Mission completed!

I have my moments.

Answers to questions posed by Friend Alice (my answers are in italics)

would you want someone to ASK you if they can kiss you right before they do? or would you prefer that they just did it??

First kiss I would ask in a dorky way. I don't think I could do so in a serious way. Sign of insecurity and inexperience? If a gal I liked were wanting some kissy kissy action tho, I say go for, don't ruin the moment by asking me cuz chances are I have already considered the question half a million times (and answered hell yeah!).


do you guys have an overwhelming desire to get outta california?

I would stay if I could, but the better education is out there. My family is here though. Service to the family is priority one... the question is short-term benefits (near family so can contribute and save money) or long-term (better education increases likelihood of higher income generation). My compromise may be: Go out of state, but promise to come back immediately afterwards.

Weather is irrelevant.
Money issues can be solved.
Parents supportive either way.

Apply first, think later.

wow, I totally got outblogged by Alice. Props... and she only started two days ago too.

It is a lot easier for me to sacrifice self than to sacrifice others. Friend Alice asked questions that left me with this conclusion. Thx Alice! You make me think!

Had a dream about an adventure. Forgot the details, but I think it was a good one.

We finished RISK!!!

Game night went well. Friends Dan, Kev, and I hosted Friends Rachelness & Dougness. Afterwards, after we put the kiddies to bed, we chatted till "4.5am." Topics covered were...future careers, rites of passage, relationships, past college experiences, type of person we are interested in...

some questions:

*What type of person do u think is attracted to you?
*What type of person do u pursue?

*What is the role of the modern female in society? rights vs. responsibilities? Traditional or liberal? Can a female ask a guy out? Females proposing?

*Do females have rites of passages?
*When you look back 20 years from now, when someone says college, what will u immediately think of? High school?

*What's your opinion of pre-marrital sex? What about living together before getting married?

Only the ugly people don't blog and/or read blogs!!!!

My answers to good questions put forth by Friend Jenny... my answers are in italics

When you are put to the test, what would you do? For example, you are on a life raft and you are with one of your friends and the raft is only big enough for one person. Would you let your friend have it or would you keep it for yourself?

I would say: "Take care of my family, you are one of us now. Get in the raft, don't look back."


Why don't we assume that you are the altruistic one and that you offer the raft to your friend. You are obviously going to die (not to sound morbid), so what would you have he or she tell your family and friends?

To my family I would say carry on our mission... *the rest would be private.*
To my friends I would say, life is short so get off ur chickenasses and be proactive dammit!!!!


How do you want to be remembered? We often take things for granted and in a century like this one, how can we not?

I agree. I want to be remembered as a servant protector of all things good and beautiful. As the King's Guard in ancient Greece used to say, "All men have fears, but the brave put down their fears and go forward, sometimes to death, but always towards victory."

I don't know about you, but I'm nowhere near being the kind of person that I want to be. There are so many things that I wish I could change about myself and I'll bet there are much more that I'm not even aware of. I was thinking these past few days what it would be like to start all over. Would I make the same choices as I did before?

I think about changing as well and for every change I make, a chain of changes surface. But to start over? Never. Why? Cuz I have been hella lucky this time around, and my luck may not be so good the next time around.


Have you ever thought that what you thought was "right" was probably the wrong choice?

All the time. Human nature 101.

So as a result of the choice that you made, you are probably living life with a sense of accomplishment because you've made the right choice. But what if there was something better, something greater, than what you have now?

The Forgotten Opportunity Cost. No one has the time and resources to go thru all the choices... for the small things, settling works. For example: You go to the supermarket, and find an aisle of tuna. Who is has all the goddamn time in the world to read all the labels to find the best one? hellllllllll no, not me!!

For big things, like the search for Lady Wang, it is all or nothing. There can only be one Lady Wang. And no, I won't choose incorrectly cuz I got 5 levels of screening for applicants :o)

Thanks for getting to think Jenny!!! Jenny am cool!

Litmus test for Gentleman and Jerks:

A gentleman follows specific rules, but the difference between a gentleman and a jerk acting as a gentlemen, is that the gentlemen will break the rules when a higher principle is at stake. A jerk is selfish, a gentleman never is... so a gentleman will know when to break the rules at the right times, while the jerk who doesn't understand the "gentleman rules" will follow them only while his selfish interests are aligned.

Be careful females, the jerks our out there in gentleman clothing... and the only way to tell is by a persons intentions and explainations for actions.

If you are unsure if u got a jerk or a gentleman,

*Your friends may be able to tell jerks faster than you can. Listen to them.
*Look at the guy's friends. Birds of a feather hang out together.

*Jon came up with this test,

SupaTantei: how about give him (guy in question) an inch
SupaTantei: whereas a gentleman will refuse because of honor sake
SupaTantei: a jerk will take it quickly

James Bond: not a gentleman
Tom Cruise in Top Gun: not a gentleman


Batman: gentleman
Superman: Gentleman
Thomas Crown Affair guy: gentleman
Captain Tyler in Irresponsible Capt. Tyler (anime): gentleman
Forrest Gump: gentleman

...there are wayyyy more jerks than gentlemen, so this list is not proportionate to the population at large.

The time for meditation has past. The State of Abe now will advance and conquer once again. Next stop, the Emerald City baby!!!

Congrads to Jon and Alice for starting blogs... Never fear that you write in vain cuz not only do u write for yourselves, u write for me!!! I'm a consistent reader, if u are are a consistent writer!!! Keep it sexi yall!!!

If you are interested in reading what they are thinking, and I can guarentee we got a couple of great minds bloggin, then IM me to ask me so i can ask them for clearence. I am the self appointed stalker stopper!

Good morning world!

Big BeeBee: i'm up early
Big BeeBee: and i intend today to be productive
Big BeeBee: extremely productive
Big BeeBee: why?
Big BeeBee: cuz it is the warriors way

>BIGG TIMMI: you have a lot to do?

Big BeeBee: i don't see an end in the near future
Big BeeBee: too many areas to conquer
Big BeeBee: the universe is my playground


The State of Abe at it's best.

Lady Wang will come in only one size: PERFECT!!!!

One other thing, Lady Wang is gonna get pampered. Nothing but the best for the best.

I'm not a macho guy. I don't act all big and buff. So if a female asks me out, I feel a bit diminished in some way. I'm not a control freak, I don't always have to be first in life. But the rules of courtship must be followed, special cases otherwise. At least let me feel like the gentleman once in a while. The Bond in me must fly free.

The gurl can help out by simply making it clear (totally obvious, like-- so i'm free tonight...) that if I ask, she will accept.

I consider myself a gentleman, therefore it is my honor to ask a gurl out and offer to pay for everything and mean it. I'm also planning to be the one that proposes. Some females have expressed inequality on this one, but I act not out of sexism, but out of honor.

One of my favorite lines is: Damn the costs, it's my baby's anniversary!!!! (Family Man, Tea Leoni plays the perfect wife)

For some reason, there doesn't seem to be many teachers that will teach one how to become financially rich. Rich people seem to get quiet post wealth bloom. How do I find out how they got rich?

Acquired 2 new study concentration tactics:

*Earplugs. Takes a week to get used to them, but once you do, wow.

*Pretend that what you are reading is top secret. If the govt finds out, it is a death sentence.

Invaded campus today to pay tuition and to read.

I decided to look up a couple books I have been looking for, and I came across a couple of really cool books. I sat down and read one, called The Servant, a book on what it meant to be second in command as advisor to princes. It started off slow, but within 3hrs, I conquered it. It complimented my current readings well and spoke from an interesting viewpoint.

Coolest Idea: each person must act their chosen role in life and do the best of his/her ability to fill that role.

I tried to check out the second book, only to be jacked by UCI again!!! Apparently, my library/ID card had been deactivated. Sheesh... UCI really knows how to punch where it hurts. Well, in defiance, i'm gonna take a whole bunch of classes next quarter (when I am a real student) to make up for current injustices.

Yet when it comes down to it, it is my bad. I had three years to take advantage of the system, but I only started to after I lost my rights.

"Be it a hundred miles of choppy water or a turbulent time in your life, the spirit of the conqueror remains the same. There comes many times in life when a person must set sail and chart out his own path, even if his companions remain safely ashore.

At this time you should learn your route, know your vessel, and face your fears. Ride the wind as long as you can, but if the wind stops, and conditions become unfavorable, be ready to take the oar in hand and force your way into port.

To be successful in life, one must have the same spirit. Many obstacles will arise, and many opponents will come against you, but do not be detoured. Make up your mind, be decisive, trust your intuition and follow your spirit. Trust the experience of others, but do not let them cause you to doubt your intuition."

--Miyamoto Musashi


An excerpt from a book I have been reading, called The Book of Five Rings. The jist that I got from this passage-- though I'd rather be a teamplayer and win with numbers, there will be times where I gotta go it on my own. I gotta face it soon that the path I have chosen is one that few people choose, and that means that there won't be much company. Whatever company I have I will charish, whenever I cannot have backup I must advance bravely. Such is the way of the conqueror.

ex: Recreational Classes, Internship, Europe 40/40, Law school.

Madonna's Die Another Day... what a beat.

Stayed up late yesterday picking thru the recreational classes offered and here are my research results...

ballroom dancing
fencing
rock climbing

Cost: $120
Time: may have to put internship idea on the backburner till next quarter... I'm graduating winter Q so i can't take these classes ever again and such a "bargain" price ever again. Sigh. Just when I thought I pulled the wool over UCI by not registering for classes and sitting in, they hit me where it hurts... fringe benefits provided by the ARC. Suckiness.

This whole idea was driven by a good point made by Justin. I get uncomfortable around females, especially when it comes to touch. Great sex i can imagine, but human touch to women my age I tend not to give. Hence the need for ballroom dancing, where touching is required. The other stuff, rock climbing and fencing, sounded interesting as i flipped thru.

Yall are welcome to sign up with me, ask me for details.

My remaining professor who I needed to fill out the recommendation forms filling came thru!!!

my immediate thought: OH THANK GOD!!!

> 1. LAST MOVIE YOU SAW IN A THEATER? Die Another Day- I I liked the theme song. I’m hoping that the shots of London will act as subliminal messaging for our Europe 40/40 trip. That’s gonna be us come this summer baby!!! Sidenote: Hally Berry isn’t as fawne as Hollywood suggests folks…. Based on looks, the evil gurl looked wayyyy better. Hermione from harry potter on the other hand…


>2. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?

the Art of War (it was mentioned in Die Another Day!!)
The book of five rings (strategy book)
Book on how to read the wallstreet journal (financial matters)
Let's Go london (guidebook for europe40/40)



> 3. FAVORITE BOARD GAME? RISK. Where true natures are revealed.


> 4. FAVORITE MAGAZINE? Money, readers digest
>
> 5. FAVORITE SMELLS? fresh laundry, the scent of a well groomed woman.
>
> 6. COMFORT FOOD? apple
>
> 7. FAVORITE SOUNDS? "I love you." Woman's orgasm (never heard one, but wouldn't it be cool to hear such things from the future Lady Wang?


> 8. WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD? "Eating something that has gone bad" -- Ihave to agree with gail on this one.
>
> 9. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING? God, my life is good.


> 10. FAVORITE FAST FOOD PLACE? in and out, arbys
>
> 11. FUTURE CHILD'S NAME? symphony, amber, elanor, azalyn, hermione... girl names are easy cuz i simply pick names that i find dateable/cute. Guy's name? well, that takes some work. Names are important and i'm planning to have a bunch of kids, so gotta start thinkin early (perhaps adopt a couple for the sake of Lady Wang?).
>
> 12. FINISH THIS STATEMENT, "IF I HAD A LOT OF
> MONEY I WOULD.... travel, then invest the rest.
>
> 13. DO YOU DRIVE FAST? i walk
>
> 14. DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? NO, i'm waiting for the real thing in 10 years or less.
>
> 15. STORMS - COOL OR SCARY? Cool if i got company.
>
> 16. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? Still waiting...(tapping foot)
>
>17. FAVORITE DRINK? martenillis sparkling apple cider.
>
> 18. FINISH THIS STATEMENT, "IF I HAD THE TIME.. travel and read... shoot, to save some time, i can do both at the same time, then invest the remaining time by helping nice people. nice people will pass on kindness, so my helping them will help them help others.

> 19. DO YOU BELIEVE IN FATE AND/OR DESTINY? hell yeah!!! her name is Lady Wang.
>
> 20. IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR, WHAT WOULD IT BE? strawberry yellow
>
> 21. HOW MANY DIFFERENT COUNTRIES HAVE YOU BEEN TO? wow, ask me personally for details... canada, bahamas, taiwan, thailand, china...
>
>22. GLASS HALF EMPTY OR FULL? half empty but gonna get filled.
>
>23. FAVORITE SPORT? tennis
>
>24. SAY ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS: It's too bad gail and emily are single. What greater compliment can u give than saying that a person is dateable?

>
>25. WHAT IS UNDER YOUR BED? I got a loft, so everything important
>
> 26. DO YOU PREFER CATS OR DOGS? Dogs. arf arf baby
>
> 27. OF ALL THE PEOPLE YOU E-MAILED THIS TO, WHO'S MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? all the fawne single females

>28. LEAST LIKELY? the ugly people.

Updating Blog Updates

It has been brought to my attention that by the time that people finish reading my rather lengthy blog entries, they don’t have time enough to write their own blog updates. Being that I love reading the blogs of others, I’m trying to think of ways to help the mental download process…

Good news: I write in a diary before blogging, and my blog entries are actually diary entry edits, about two-thirds as long. My quarter off gives me plenty of time to do free-range thinking, so the future blogging may not be as abundant.

Contradiction in Thoughts

I want to be disciplined cuz that seems like the way things get done. But I don’t want to push self too hard cuz I see the dire effects of stress—white hair, lack of hair, raised voice, permanent frown… Not sure how to solve this thought paradox.

American Dreamin’

I love America, but I continue to be shocked and dismayed at the need to buy things that Americans seem to have. Thank goodness for the spending cuz its keeping the economy up, but it is gonna screw us in the longterm… yes, you are reading the “Chicken Wang Little” version of the sky falling in the future.

It is steadily propelling me in the other direction toward what I call fiscal squirrelism. I’m gonna bring in the money, then HOLD THE MONEY till we hit the coming crash, then spend like crazy to buy quality things cheap. So there!!!!

Personal Statement Progress—So Close Yet So Far

Finished my fourth essay on why I want to go to law school thinking I had finally figured things out within four concise pages… Then Bon looked at it. She made some structural suggestions that were too good to refuse, so back to the drawing board.

I’m not going to see the law school application process as “awww fuck why am I stilllllllll not done?!,” but choose to see it as “well, I just gotta get things figured out, and if it takes me a bit more time to get my reasons for law school straightened out, then so be it.”

Completed Readings

Finished the Patton leadership book… It has interested me in reading Patton’s memoirs called “War as I Knew It.” (Yes, more books…) This guy seems to have qualities similar to Hitler, thank goodness he was fighting on ‘our’ side. Lessons to store include Patton’s strive to beat all the odds, ability to build cooperation of troops, and his courage to move forward.

Finished the Zipper book… it made a reference to Andrew Carnegie’s book, “Gospel of Wealth.” I bought this book cuz it seemed odd someone could write a 300 page book on this subject, and cuz I needed an extra $5 in orders to get a bookstore discount. It was actually pretty good reading, and it complimented my other readings on economic history well.

I don’t know whether to be happy or sad that I keep on finding books that are interesting to read. It seems the harder I try to shrink the booklist, the longer it gets. Never a boring moment since age nine.

**Note: if you are bored and/or interested in the books I read, then by all means, ask to borrow. If you own one of the books I talk about reading or think you got something I’d love, PLEASE LET ME BORROW IT!!!

I’ve taken to looking at stars at night. You are welcome to join me.

The third year since the passing of A-m; the skies have never seemed as bright since, the world never as good. May the battles we continue to fight in this world be as noteworthy and as influential.

Watched James Bond Movie

I liked the theme song. I’m hoping that the shots of London will act as subliminal messaging for our Europe 40/40 trip. That’s gonna be us come this summer baby!!! Sidenote: Hally Berry isn’t as fawne as Hollywood suggests folks…. Based on looks, the evil gurl looked wayyyy better. Hermione on the other hand…

Rites of Passage (ROP):

The test of manhood (or womanhood for females). In the absence of world war, boys of this generation need a litmus test for manhood that goes beyond simply looking down and finding hair ‘down there.’ Sidenote: for females, I think childbirth should qualify…

We thought the East Coast Odyssey (it will soon be the one year anniversary) would be our ROP. Justin claims our 18 day trip was sufficient ROP, and Richard doesn’t believe in the ROP concept, and I initially thought it was a ROP when we arrived, but now I don’t think it should count.

To us it may have been a ROP cuz scared rabbits conquering anything is a feat, but to the world, even conquering the crown of our trip, New York, is peanuts. I need something that, when people find out, they go “wooo!”

Thusfar, the closest thing to ROP I have experienced is going to college and having to adjust to new surroundings without an initial friendship network. But I found out Irvine is very much like Arcadia.

So the search for ROP continues…

I got two potentials in mind: Europe 40/40 or law school (far away). Europe will likely be a reproduction of New York in that we will be using a similar battle plan of backpacking, so I’m not sure it will be a ROP. It is five weeks though, so who knows.

Law school is supposed to be like mental boot camp, so it might qualify, especially if it far away from asian-dom Irvine or Arcadia (Arc-asia). I do not consider a law school far away (as in outside CA) practical, but it may be necessary. I want to be a boy at heart and keep the childish wonder, but I cannot remain a boy as a whole and expect to survive the real world.

Thanks Justin for bringing this issue up at an appropriate time when I am at the crossroads of my life. Justin am cool.